We're all just little kids!

A few weeks ago we hosted some coaching clinics for the parks and recreation departments. I have really come to enjoy those clinics and the people who attend. It's always a good time of sharing and learning and even the Southwind coaches who work the clinics learn new things... especially about people.

One of the lessons I've learned over the years is that we are all still little children... and that's a good thing. And all children like to play... and I think we some times forget that.

During the coaching clinic we try to introduce some "games" as warm ups or to break up a practice. We play line tag, bridge tag, zoo race... and it's amazing to see how quickly adult men and women can enjoy the simple act of running, chasing and being chased. The screams of laughter and delight as well as the effort they put into the games is amazing. I can envision each of them as 12 year old children and what their personalities must of have been like at that age. It reminds me that we all need to take time to play... to enjoy life... and giggle every once in a while.

But more than that, when I coach I not only have to deal with children and young adults but many times I have to work with their parents. Conversations about their children, commitments to the club, schedules for practices and training. And it's inevitable, there are times of conflict resolution. I remember that even though they are adults there is still a child in there... and I can many times see that child within the parent as we discuss or deal with difficult issues.

I have dealt with people who believe they are always right (but they do not recognize it)... and I can see that stubborn child. I have talked to people who are intimidated by my position of authority... and I can see that quiet child who never spoke up. I have had meetings with people who don't like to have meetings but understand the importance of dealing with difficult issues... and I can see that responsible child. I have had to corner parents who refuse to admit there are issues to deal with... and I see the child who avoids conflict at all cost. There are have been parents in the club who share their opinions (no matter how off base they may seem to us) to everyone and produce drama that was never there... and I see a child who desperately wants attention and needs to feel in control.

So yes, I still see the child in many of us... including myself. So in dealing with people I have to remind myself that I am not only dealing with children and young adults on the court but also off the court. I remind myself of this because it is just as important to be patient with the parents of our players as it is to be with our players. Although adult men and women can choose how to interact or respond to the world around them in challenging situations they almost always go back to what feels most comfortable for them and many times it's the response they had as children.

When I remind myself that each of us still have that child inside of us it makes it much easier to understand the families I work with. And it's also a reminder to me that I have to take time out to play and have fun just as much as I allow others to play.